One and Only
by kamification
Summary: HeYa RPF. The change occurs in one weekend. Heather's mom comes to visit for Heather's appearance on Saturday Night Live and notices the things that have remained unspoken. Who knew a visit from mom could change everything?
1. Chapter 1

___"I'm so sorry Heather." She repeated over and over, tears welling up in her eyes. "I never—"  
>"Save it Naya. You knew exactly what you were doing. You knew it would never work but you pushed and you pushed. I gave in because I felt bad for you. I was drunk and you were pathetic, practically undressing me with your eyes. It was pity sex. Did you really ever think I'd love you like that? And you told my mother that you were in love with me. MY MOTHER NAYA! She warned me about you from the beginning, I guess she was right." Heather said, fire flashing in her normally laughing blue eyes.<br>"You disgust me." And with that she turned around and walked out of the trailer and out of Naya's life for what felt like forever._

_"Heather! Please…I'm so sor—" Naya collapsed into sobs on the floor as the door of her trailer slammed shut so loudly it shattered her heart.  
>"Heather…Heather…Heather…" she sobbed. <em>__

Naya awoke with tears streaming down her face. Sweat made her bangs stick to her forehead and her heart was pounding so loudly in her chest she didn't know how it hadn't woken her best friend who was sleeping peacefully next to her.  
>Seeing the naked blonde next to her, the very same one who'd said those hurtful things and walked out on Naya in her dream, brought fresh tears to Naya's eyes.<br>Her brain filled with every emotion she felt about her best friend and what they had done, what they were doing continually.  
>She knew she'd never get back to sleep.<br>Her tears turned to sobs as she let the love she felt for the girl fully consume her. As always the guilt and shame followed closely behind.  
>Heather was her best friend.<br>Her best friend who was a girl.  
>Her best friend who was a girl and had a boyfriend.<br>Her best friend who was a girl and had a boyfriend and was a devout Christian.  
>Yes, this was wrong on so many levels.<p>

Suddenly Naya's proximity to her vice made her sick to her stomach. She didn't deserve to be this close to the pure angel she so often tainted with her lips and fingers.  
>The memories of the night before came flooding back in vivid detail intensifying Naya's sobs.<br>She climbed out of the bed as quickly and quietly as she could, not wanting what she knew was rapidly turning into a panic attack, to wake the slumbering beauty.  
>Naya stumbled to the bathroom, hot tears flooding out of her eyes as her sobs ripped at her from the inside out. She turned on the shower and turned the handle until the water was scalding hot.<br>She got in and collapsed under the weight of all she was feeling as she felt herself begin to shake. Naya attributed the shaking partially to shock from the heat, but mostly to the pure hatred she felt for herself, as she did every morning.


	2. Chapter 2

Title: One and Only, Chapter 2  
>Pairing: Naya RiveraHeather Morris  
>Rating: PG-13 for angst kinda suggestive scenes  
>Word Count: 1,761<br>Summary: The change occurs in one weekend. Heather's mom comes to visit for Heather's appearance on Saturday Night Live and notices the things that have remained unspoken. Who knew a visit from mom could change everything?  
>AN: Thanks for all the support everyone! I'm really glad you all like it. :] I'm working on chapter 3 as we speak and hopefully I'll have it up by Monday.

"I'm so sorry Heather…I never…Heather! Please. I'm so sor—"

Heather woke up to the sound of her best friend having another nightmare. She rolled onto her side facing away from the girl talking in her sleep, tears filling her eyes.  
>She knew there's nothing she can do. She knew that Naya doesn't feel the way she does. She knew that Naya doesn't want to do this time after time, but they do.<p>

"Heather, Heather, Heather…"  
>Heather's tears begin to fall as she hears Naya call out her name. She knows Naya's crying now too, she can hear it in her voice.<br>Heather wanted to turn and comfort her friend. She wanted to hold Naya and kiss away the tears and the fears.  
>Instead, noticing that Naya was awake, she stayed still, closing her eyes and pretending to be asleep. "Now is not the time to talk about anything," she thought to herself.<br>She felt Naya stiffen next to her before a ragged breath escaped her lips. It was not the kind of ragged breath Heather was used to hearing from Naya, and it pained her to know she was a part of what was having this effect on her best friend.  
>Heather was using her; she had a boyfriend who she loved.<br>Loved. Past tense.  
>From the day she met the fiery, fun loving Latina Heather's love for her boyfriend began to slowly shift. At first she thought that she and Naya were destined to be best friends and that her want, no need to be around the beautiful brunette was just a product of that. But as she spent more time with Naya she noticed that she began to love her boyfriend less and love her best friend more, and not just in a friendly way.<br>Unfortunately, Heather knew it would never work. Naya was a girl; a straight girl who was aware of and supported her relationship.  
>Beyond all that, Naya had been raised strictly Catholic and Heather knew her parents would flip if Naya ever told them she was dating a girl.<br>"You can't always get what you want." Heather sang in her head, laughing at the irony. Naya was both what Heather wanted and what she needed. The sad reality was that there was every reason against them and not very many for them.

Heather felt Naya slip out of bed and watched her silently walk into the bathroom. As Naya crossed through the moonlight coming in from the window, Heather saw the glimmer of wetness on her cheeks.  
>She shut her eyes as she felt a fresh wave of her own tears push against her tightly closed eyelids. She heard the shower turn on and it wasn't long after that she opened her eyes and saw steam seeping out from under the door.<br>Because the steam was produced so quickly Heather knew immediately that Naya had the shower turned up as hot as it could go.  
>She was punishing herself.<p>

Heather got up and walked to the bathroom door, driven by impulse to protect and comfort the girl that had become her best friend in every sense. She took a deep breath and opened the door.  
>The steam billowed out, almost knocking her down with the suffocating heat. When most of it had cleared the room, Heather looked in the shower and found Naya curled up in the corner shaking as the hot water pelted her skin like pebbles.<br>The Latina's normally tan skin was visibly red from exposure to the extreme heat, and Heather's heart broke at the sight of her normally strong, bold, powerful best friend looking so frail, scared, and broken.  
>She swallowed down the guilt she couldn't help but feel and stepped into the shower with the girl she had come to love.<p>

The scalding water stung on Heather's skin. She didn't understand why Naya did this to herself since standing under the hot water felt like hell. If anything it was Heather who deserved this punishment, not Naya.  
>Heather endured her punishment for a few moments longer before she reached for the shower knob and turned the temperature of the water down.<br>She turned around to finally face her best friend who was trembling and sobbing quietly as she curled further into herself.  
>Heather took a deep breath before taking a step towards the girl.<p>

"Nay?" Heather said timidly.  
>The girl showed no sign of response so Heather dropped to her knees in front of her best friend.<br>"Nay, look at me." The girl still didn't move.  
>Heather shuffled over to the corner, positioning herself with her back against the wall and pulled the still sobbing girl into her embrace. As she rocked Naya gently in her arms, a song came into her head.<br>She smiled faintly and began humming the melody out loud to no one in particular. Heather felt the girl begin relax in her arms, her sobs becoming less violent, and her breath becoming less ragged and so she started to sing lowly.

_Whenever I'm alone with you__  
><em>_You make me feel like I am home again__  
><em>_Whenever I'm alone with you__  
><em>_You make me feel like I am whole again_

Naya's sobbing stopped completely. She just lay limply in Heather's arms trying to catch her breath. Heather took that as a good sign.  
>She picked up the shampoo, squeezed some in her hand, and began tenderly massaging it through Naya's hair, creating suds as she began the second verse.<p>

_Whenever I'm alone with you__  
><em>_You make me feel like I am young again__  
><em>_Whenever I'm alone with you__  
><em>_You make me feel like I am fun again_

On the last line she placed a small cluster of suds on Naya's nose and a hint of a smile pulled at the corners of the girl's mouth.  
>At this Heather allowed herself a small smile as rose, pulling her best friend up to stand in front of her. She brushed her fingers over the smaller girl's eyes and continued to hum.<br>Heather picked up her body wash and squeezed some onto a loofah before softly kissing Naya's left shoulder and passing the loofah over it.  
>She kissed the left side of her neck and then passed the loofah over it as well, wiping away the memory of the kiss. Heather moved to the right side of her neck and then her right shoulder repeating the actions.<br>Heather tenderly cleaned her best friend in hopes of washing off the guilt and the self-loathing she could tell her friend was feeling.  
>She reached around Naya and pulled the shower head out from its fixture on the wall. With her other hand she lifted her friend's chin, gazing into her eyes as she began to sing again.<br>She sang the chorus this time, her voice louder, bolder.

_However far away__  
><em>_I will always love you__  
><em>_However long I stay__  
><em>_I will always love you__  
><em>_Whatever words I say__  
><em>_I will always love you._

As she sang, Heather brought the shower head up and gently rinsed the shampoo out of the smaller girl's hair. When her hair was clean she moved the shower head down her body, rinsing away all the suds and all the sadness.  
>Heather finished cleansing her friend and swept Naya's hair over her shoulder. She turned off the water and wrapped her arms around the girl's waist pulling her into one final embrace and placing a small kiss on the back of her neck.<p>

By the time Heather was done, Naya's demeanor had changed completely. She was now calm, her muscles relaxed, and a small content smile was displayed on her lips as her best friend held her.  
>Her eyes were glazed over with a mix of relaxation and exhaustion as Naya turned to face the girl who had healed her in her moment of complete brokenness.<br>She looked up into Heather's baby blue eyes and was met with complete vulnerability and openness looking back at her. She opened her mouth, her voice croaking at first but growing to full strength as she finished the song, pouring every ounce of emotion she had left into it.  
>She was trying to convey to Heather just how much this moment had meant to her; how much Heather meant to her.<p>

_Whenever I'm alone with you__  
><em>_You make me feel like I am free again__  
><em>_Whenever I'm alone with you__  
><em>_You make me feel like I am clean again_

_However far away__  
><em>_I will always love you__  
><em>_However long I stay__  
><em>_I will always love you__  
><em>_Whatever words I say__  
><em>_I will always love you_

Naya maintained eye contact with the blonde through the end of the song, tears filling both of their eyes. She leaned in giving Heather a short but passionate kiss on the lips before pulling her into a tight embrace.  
>"I will always love you," she said into Heather's hair so quietly that she wasn't even sure if her best friend had heard her.<br>The slight tightening of Heather's arms around her neck let her know that she had indeed.  
>"Me too, Nay. Me too," Heather replied just as quietly.<br>Normally Naya hated it when she said "I love you" and people didn't respond by saying the full statement back, but in this moment Heather's response was enough for Naya; it was perfect. She let go of her best friend stepping around her and out of the shower.  
>Wrapping herself in a towel, Naya looked back at Heather one last time as she walked out of the bathroom. She heard the shower start up again just as she closed the bathroom door.<br>A single tear formed at the corner of Naya's left eye. She didn't even try to fight it back as she stared blankly at the bed she'd spent hours in the night before. She didn't even bother to wipe it away as it escaped and ran down her cheek.

In the shower, behind the now closed bathroom door, Heather felt a single warm drop down the right side of her face. She wasn't surprised at the tear as its warmth distinguished itself from icy cold water that was running out of the shower head.  
>She let it fall to the tile floor mixing and getting lost in the water swirling down the drain.<br>Heather shivered, but it wasn't from the cold water. The cold she was feeling was from the inside.  
>The cold that starts at your core and chills you from the inside out.<br>The cold that a million scalding showers could never remedy.


	3. Chapter 3

Title: One and Only, Chapter 3  
>Pairing: Naya RiveraHeather Morris  
>Rating: PG less angsty<br>Word Count: ~1,500

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters/people and none of this ever actually happened…to my knowledge.  
>Summary: The change occurs in one weekend. Heather's mom comes to visit for Heather's appearance on Saturday Night Live and notices the things that have remained unspoken. Who knew a visit from mom could change everything?<br>A/N: I'm really sorry this took so long to finish. It's been a busy week full of drama and homework. My classes are winding down so I don't have as much time to write fic as I thought. Chapter 4 is currently in the works, I'm hoping to have done this weekend so you guys don't have to wait forever for another update.

Naya got dressed quickly the sound of the water running in the bathroom pervading her thoughts.  
>She was having trouble deciding what she was going to do next. Her heart told her to stay; to talk to Heather about what just happened in the shower and what had been happening between them for months.<br>She wanted so badly to know what was going on. She wanted to know if this was destroying her best friend as much as it was destroying her, but her head told her to run.  
>It told her to run back to her apartment, run back to the safety of silence, run back and to hide her head in the sand, never to face the reality and consequences of the nights and mornings that she and Heather shared so often.<br>She was torn, so she did what she does every time she feels the slightest bit of discomfort. She ran.  
>Ashley was used to this by now. It had been going on for months after all. She wasn't surprised when she saw Naya leave Heather's room, her emotions uncontrollably displayed on her face; a depressing mix of exhaustion, heartbrokenness, and shame.<br>The girl didn't notice Ashley sitting on the couch where she sat with a blanket spread over her legs and a cup of tea in her hand. She watched Naya walk into the kitchen and absentmindedly begin to make coffee.

"You guys really should talk," Ashley said matter-of-factly.  
>Naya jumped at the sudden intrusion on the silence. She had been so wrapped up in her own thoughts that she hadn't even noticed Heather's roommate sitting on the couch.<br>"Talk about what?" Naya asked, knowing full well what the girl on the couch was talking about. She hoped that her skills as a professional actress would allow her to hide the lie in her voice.  
>"You know damn well what you guys need to talk about. You're not that good of an actress Rivera," Ashley responded with a hint of teasing behind her voice.<br>She then heard the girl, in the kitchen, open the cabinet and grab two mugs, sit them on the counter, and open the refrigerator.  
>"And besides, HeMo is anything but quiet," Ashley added smugly.<p>

She heard Naya's breath catch and when she turned and saw her leaning on the counter, head in her hands, she immediately felt bad for her last comment.  
>"Hey, it's cool," Ashley said trying to back track.<br>"I'm glad you guys are um..comfortable...with each other and having fun. I wouldn't normally say anything if that was all it is. But it's not. And we both know that."  
>Her voice softened as she ended her speech, knowing she was treading into dangerous territory.<br>The other girl had finished making the coffee and the sound of the shower, in the back room, had stopped.  
>Naya gently shook her head as she listened to Ashley telling her everything she already knew. She hoped that her motions could shake away the thoughts in her head as the truth was put so blatantly in front of her. She knew it was more than just her and Heather having fun. At least on her end it was. But she didn't want to ruin everything. She didn't want to lose her best friend. She couldn't.<p>

"You need to tell her Nay." Ashley said quietly, with an almost a pleading tone in her voice.  
>Naya shook her head more violently as she stared into the cup of coffee on the counter. She wasn't sure if she was saying no to Ashley or shaking her head at herself in disappointment as the overwhelming feeling to run bubbled deep in her stomach.<br>She was about to run from the truth, yet again. She was a coward.

Naya realized that the shower had stopped; Heather would emerge from the bedroom freshly showered and looking just as beautiful as she did every morning.  
>Naya knew she couldn't handle that. She couldn't face Heather right now. She poured her coffee into a travel mug. Then she grabbed another mug from the cabinet and quickly prepared another cup of coffee just the way Heather liked it. She ignored the eyes she could feel burning into the side of her face from the girl on the couch, and put the mug in microwave.<br>Naya grabbed her keys off the counter and slipped into her shoes, which had been placed neatly by the door, revealing that Ashley had been prepared for her hasty exit.  
>She picked up her purse and opened the door. Stopping halfway through she turned back and met Ashley's eyes, which still hadn't left her. They were filled with a level of concern and sadness that was almost enough to make Naya stay. Almost.<p>

The look in Ashley's eyes also made Naya want to spill her soul and that terrified her. Her instinct to run kicked into overdrive, but before she gave in she just had to know.  
>"When did you know?" Naya managed to ask before her voice betrayed her sadness and fear and the fact that she was on the verge of tears for the third time that morning.<br>"The night when Heather and Taylor broke up briefly a couple months ago. You were holding Heather, in your arms, as she cried. She couldn't see the look on your face, but I could. You looked like you were in just as much pain as she was and when she fell asleep in your arms, I could see it in the way you looked at her. There was still sadness in your eyes but there was something else; a sparkle that I've only seen in the eyes of people completely head over heels in love. When you were up before her the next morning making pancakes, I knew for sure."  
>Ashley laughed at that last part of the memory and added, "You never get up early and you don't even like pancakes."<br>Naya smiled slightly, remembering that night. It was the same night she had realized that she was in love with her best friend too. Seeing Heather so torn up and completely broken had hurt Naya's heart more than any breakup she had ever experienced herself, and when her best friend had fallen asleep in her arms, Naya knew she had found the happiest place on earth. She'd hardly slept that night; her brain had been so full of excitement, fear and confusion. She didn't know where these new feelings would lead or if they were even real. The girl she loved was single, but Naya hadn't know if Heather loved her back. Even if she had, Naya had been afraid of what that would mean to their families, to their friends, the ones outside of work anyways because the cast would be ecstatic for them. She hadn't known how her fans and the press would react to it. There were a lot of unknowns, but they had all been out shadowed by the fact that Naya was truly, madly, and deeply in love for first time in her life. She had been so energized by that thought that she got up and decided to make Heather 'd made pancakes despite the fact she despised them; they were Heather's favorite. She'd done it to comfort Heather as a best friend after a bad break up, but she'd also done it as her first act of sacrifice and love for her best friend.

Now standing in the doorway, Naya remembered everything she'd felt that morning; excitement, confusion, and fear. She laughed bitterly in her head.  
>The first two feelings had quickly faded. Excitement left when Heather and Taylor got back together less than five days after their breakup. Confusion faded the night Heather and Naya hooked up for the first time, both drunk after a party at Cory's house that had gotten wildly out of hand. Heather was drunker than Naya, and she'd felt so ashamed when her best friend passed out naked next to her. More than that, she'd felt sadness because those intimate moments they'd shared that night meant more to Naya than any other intimate moments she'd had in her life.<p>

For Naya, the only emotion left from that night was fear. She was afraid of everything about Heather. She was afraid of being alone with her. She was afraid of being close to her. She was afraid of kissing Heather at work because the script called for it. She was afraid of dancing with Heather as they so often did at parties and clubs and just when they were hanging out. She was afraid of being intimate with Heather, a routine they had slipped into just as easily as they had slipped into being best friends. She was afraid of loving Heather and she was afraid of losing her.

That was what scared her most, the realization that was coming upon her quickly that it had to be one or the other. She either had to love Heather as her lover, her one and only, or she had to lose her.

Naya was broken out of her trance by the sound of Heather's bedroom door opening. She finally gave in to her instinct to run and with one last look into Ashley's concerned and sad eyes, Naya backed out and closed the door quietly.


	4. Chapter 4

Title: One and Only, Chapter 4  
>Pairing: Naya RiveraHeather Morris  
>Rating: PG<br>Word Count: ~1,500

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters/people and none of this ever actually happened…to my knowledge.  
>Summary: The change occurs in one weekend. Heather's mom comes to visit for Heather's appearance on Saturday Night Live and notices the things that have remained unspoken. Who knew a visit from mom could change everything?<br>A/N: Finals are upon me which means less fic and more studying but I promise I'll write as much as I can. Only another week really and then I'll be writing like crazy, so stay tuned and as always, enjoy.

Heather showered as quickly as her tired body would allow. After nights and mornings like this on top of being in peak season for Glee and Heather's dancing to keep herself from having a meltdown through it all, her body was exhausted. She got out of the shower and settled on wearing sweats and a jersey tee, after all she was just going to set and would be changing straight into costume.

She walked towards the kitchen hoping to see Naya there, but knowing that she wouldn't. After last night she knew her best friend would be gone. Heather would have to find her down on set, push aside her own feelings, and pretend that nothing was wrong and nothing happened for the sake of their friendship and more importantly, the sake of their jobs. A storyline between her and Naya's characters was finally being developed and as a result they had to pretend to be in love in almost every scene they were in together. The pretending to be in love with Naya part wasn't hard for Heather, it came naturally. After all, she was in love with her; the hard part came when the director yelled "cut" and Heather had to pretend not to be. That was the true test of her acting abilities.

Heather saw her roommate sitting on the couch staring into the cup in her hand. Heather couldn't read her expression, something that didn't happen very often.

"Everything okay Ash?" Heather asked worried.

"What?" Ashley asked torn from her thoughts by the voice of her roommate. She looked up to see Heather's face. A small smile was there but the rest of her face betrayed her; it was slightly sunken in and her eyes displayed her exhaustion and emotional turmoil.

"I asked if everything is okay." Heather said trying to muster the last bit of concern she had to show her friend.

", just thinking about stuff." Ashley replied. She wasn't exactly lying, she had been thinking about stuff. She just didn't want to reveal in depth what it was she was thinking about.

Heather could see that her roommate was lying but was in no mood to push her. _She'll tell me if she needs to talk about something_ she thought to herself walking into the kitchen. Each step was heavy, she needed coffee. She opened the cabinet and pulled out a mug.

"There's already a cup for you in the microwave." Ashley informed Heather.

"Oh." Heather replied, slightly surprised. "Did you?" She asked, already knowing the answer but wanting to hear it from her friend anyways.

"No, Naya did. Before she—"

"Got it." Heather cut in before her roommate could finish the sentence. Heather knew, even if she wouldn't admit it to herself, that when Naya left like this it was because she was avoiding her. The thoughts alone were hard enough, she didn't know if she could bear hearing it out loud.

She grabbed the cup of coffee out of the microwave. It was still hot. _Naya must've left just as I was getting dressed._ Heather thought to herself. She thought to ask her roommate but regardless of whether she was right in her assumptions or not, the answer was still going to hurt. She hated that she couldn't face her best friend after nights like this. It'd often take hours for them to even be able to look at each other and days before their friendship returned to normal. Well, what had become their new normal since they started sleeping together.

Heather sat down on the couch crossing her legs, facing her roommate. She turned on the TV and flipped through channels until she landed on Saved by the Bell. It was her favorite TV show and a morning ritual of her and Ashley's. She sipped on her coffee and stared at the TV screen hoping to get lost in the drama of the characters in the show rather than dwell on her own. A joke one of the characters made reminded her of Naya and again her thoughts quickly shifted back to the girl.

"You guys need to talk." Ashley said interrupting the thoughts of her zoned out roommate. She had watched the blonde's face change as her thoughts, Ashley guessed, shifted from the coffee made by Naya to Saved by the Bell and then back to Naya.

"Huh?" Heather said shocked by her roommate's words. She had been lost in her thoughts but not so far that she hadn't heard Ashley's suggestion.

"You heard me, you need to talk to her. And please don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about." Ashley responded but confidently but with care in her voice.

Heather's first instinct was to deny what her friend was implying but she was tired of holding it in and Ashley was looking at her with soft, knowing eyes. "I love her Ash." Heather said immediately feeling wetness on her cheeks.

"I know." Ashley said, her heart breaking at her best friend's tears. She moved closer to the other girl and rested her hand on her knee. Heather's hand immediately reached down, seeking the much needed comfort from her best friend.

"Heather, look at me." Ashley said, lifting her friend's chin with her free hand. She wiped away the tears streaming down the blonde's cheek. "You need to tell her. You need to tell her before it breaks you, before it destroys your relationship."

"I—I can't." Heather stammers between tears. "It will ruin everything. Sometimes I feel like it already has."

"The cup of coffee in your hand tells me otherwise." Ashley countered. "Just sit her down and talk to her. She's your best friend and you love her. You owe it to her to talk about everything that has been going on between you two. And if I were you, I'd do it before your mom comes in this weekend. You two are a mess around each other and you really don't want your mom asking questions about this do you?"

"Oh my God." Heather's eyes shot up, a look of terror on her face. "Shit, shit, shit. I need to talk to Naya like right now. If my mom finds out, oh God."

She jumped up from the couch panicked but still graceful, not spilling the coffee in her hand. She put the cup on the coffee table and began to nervously pace back and forth.

"I can't. She can't. I just." Heather's freak out escalated as thoughts of her mom finding out what was going on between her and Naya. "She'd tell Taylor and then –" Heather froze and her face completely paled at the thought of her mom telling her boyfriend. _ And then I'd be single and I _could_ actually feel this way about Naya. _She thought to herself. She panicked again at the relief she felt at the thought.

"No no no no no. It can't be like this." Heather said springing back into action. She had to get to set and she had to find Naya. She had to talk to her.

Ashley watched her roommate freak out with a slightly amused grin on her face. Gay panic, she had seen it several times with other friends in her life. It had always turned out okay for them and she knew it would be okay for Heather, if Heather could ever learn to accept herself. Heather and Naya were the perfect couple, everyone around them knew it, the two just refused to accept it or talk about it. But judging by Heather's ramblings during her freak out, that was about to change.

Heather didn't even bother to finish her coffee. She was running on adrenaline from panic and nerves and something that nipped at the back of her mind that felt like excitement, though she wasn't sure what about this situation could possibly excite her. She supposed it would be nice to finally know what was going on between her and her best friend. She grabbed her keys and her purse and pulled on the first pair of shoes she could find. She was out the door without as much as a thank you or see you later to Ashley but she did here her roommate call good luck after her.

Ashley sighed, relaxing back into the couch a small proud grin on her face. Her work as best friend and roommate had been accomplished. She'd planted the seed in Naya's head and she knew that if Heather approached the Latina, she'd talk. After her conversation with Ashley this morning Heather had left out of their apartment in a hurry to go find the smaller girl, her mission was to talk about their relationship. Ashley was fairly confident that things would end well between the two girls, and that she'd finally have an easy, peaceful and happy home once again. Her phone vibrated on the coffee table, she picked it up expecting the text message to be from Heather. Her heart stopped and the grin disappeared from her face as she read the actual message.

"_Hey Ash! Could you pick me and Taylor up from the airport and drive us to set. We want to surprise Heather. She doesn't know I'm coming this early and she doesn't know that Taylor is flying in for the weekend. We get in at 9am. Thanks love! – Mama Morris"_


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I apologize that this chapter took so long. Both my beta and I were finishing up our semesters at college and moving out so we were super busy. Here's the longest chapter yet, hope it shows how thankful I am for you guys waiting patiently. :]**

Naya's trip home after leaving Heather's had been brief. She had only stopped in to change clothes and get a grip on something that was her own.

As she stood in her apartment it felt empty, foreign. She looked at the made bed (it hadn't been slept in for days) and was suddenly overcome with exhaustion.

She wanted to crawl into that bed, the bed that wasn't Heather's, and sleep for days. She wanted to sleep long enough for this feeling crawling under her skin and nesting in the back of her brain to shrivel up and die.

Naya certainly didn't want to face Heather's mom this weekend. The woman had become like a second mother to her and she didn't know if she could lie to her.

She was afraid she'd come down with an instantaneous and fatal case of word vomit that would change her and Heather's lives forever. A change Naya was not on any level ready for.

She sighed. It was a heavy sigh, full of too many questions and not enough answers, too many desires and not enough satisfaction, and too much emotion and not nearly enough outlets.

It was a sigh that came more from her soul than it did her lungs. She sighed again, a shallow exhale this time, to clear the weight that had settled from the previous breath.

Naya had to be strong. Her job was on the line, but more importantly her friendship with Heather, her heart.

She took one last look around the room hoping to find some small symbol that would give her that familiar feeling of contentment, but she knew it was useless. That the room didn't feel foreign because she had spent most of her time elsewhere, it felt foreign because any place without Heather felt foreign.  
>It wasn't Heather's apartment that felt like home to her, it wasn't even their shared trailer that the two friends spent countless hours in that felt like home to Naya, it was Heather.<p>

Since the day they met, Heather's presence had always put Naya in a state of peace and calm that she had never known. Even when they were having one of their awkward, "off" moments after sleeping together, Heather was still the only person Naya actually felt herself wanting to be around although she did her best to convince Heather otherwise.

Heather was her home and everywhere else was just space. At that moment, in her house, Naya wanted more than anything to just be home.

She closed her bedroom door and walked out her apartment without much hesitation or second thought. She got in her car and began her drive to the set of Glee; the place she knew she'd find, sitting on the couch in their trailer, her home.

Heather arrived on set before Naya. She had been running on adrenaline which had overpowered her fear but now, sitting in her trailer, the fear was quickly taking over.

"What am I about to do? What am I even gonna say? What if she—"

Heather's thoughts were cut short by the door of her trailer opening. Naya walked up the stairs, a small half-hearted smile on her face. It wasn't a real smile, Heather knew, because it didn't reach the girl's eyes.

Naya's cheeks were rosy from the chilled morning air. It was colder than normal for a March morning in California.

_"Gosh, she's beautiful,"_Heather thought, feeling a flush creeping up in her cheeks and a smile curling on her lips.

Naya looked up, noticing that she wasn't alone in the trailer. Her smile brightened at the sight of Heather sitting on the couch with one leg tuck snugly under her. She was blushing slightly, her blue eyes more gray than normal, but dancing with a spark that Naya couldn't quite place.

The soft smile on the blonde's face was timid but warm nonetheless.

"_Wow she's nothing short of perfection,"_Naya said to herself. She couldn't help the smile that widened and became genuine as she fully took in the vision that was her best friend.

Naya ran her eyes from the chipped nail polish on Heather's toes to the fading dance sweats, up cream colored arms stemming from the nervous bundles of energy that were Heather's hands and, Naya knew from experience, nimble fingers.

She followed the trail back up Heather's toned arms to her strong but slender and sensitive neck, one of Naya's favorite parts of the dancer's anatomy.

Finally Naya's eyes drank in Heather's face, a sight that she often found herself staring at because in her eyes, it was flawless.

Heather's features were defined but not harshly so; they were subtly striking in the most breathtaking way. Her lips were soft and slightly plump and often tasted like strawberry lip gloss.

Her nose came to an easy point that Naya loved to just barely wrap her lips around when they were being playful.

Heather's eyes, possibly the Latina's favorite part of her best friend, were big, almond shaped, and slightly slanted giving an exotic look to the otherwise All-American girl.

They were a piercing blue unlike any blue eyes Naya had ever seen before. Naya also knew that they became a grayish blue when Heather was upset or contemplative and a deep blue when they were half hidden behind heavy lids displaying signs of Heather's lust, desire, and need.

But Naya's favorite state of the beautiful baby blues was when Heather was feeling particularly happy, mischievous, or playful and her eyes sparkled as if all the stars from the night sky were shining within them.

Heather's eyes told Naya everything the girl's lips often would not; everything Heather was hiding. They betrayed her every lie, portrayed her every fear, and gave away her every joke.

Heather's eyes truly were the gateway to her soul and perhaps that's why Naya liked them best about the dancer. When she looked into those eyes at any given moment she could see what Heather was feeling, she could feel what Heather was feeling.

The moments Naya needed to look into those eyes most were after her and Heather had finished pleasuring each other and Naya's fears and inner demons crept into her mind and took overtook the pure bliss she felt guilty for experiencing.

When she looked into Heather's eyes during those times she saw everything she needed to be able to curl up in the other girl's arms and fall asleep with a smile on her face. In those eyes she saw satisfaction, happiness, small hints of playfulness, but more than anything else, Naya saw pure love. She saw a love so overwhelming and true that she felt it to her core and it scared her in the most wonderful of ways.

It was in that love, in that fear, in those moments, and those eyes that Naya saw her future. Even though Naya knew that Heather wasn't actually hers, she saw a complete vulnerability and honesty in those looks that told her everything she needed to know. They told her that without a doubt that she had a part of the blonde's soul and heart that no one else would ever have. Heather was hers in the most eternal sense, though their physical possession was fleeting.

But, that look and those nights were becoming too much and not enough all at the same time for Naya. She needed to have all of Heather or none of her. She needed to be able to scream their love from the rooftops and kiss her in public. She needed to live out all of her dreams of kids and a house and a future with Heather. She needed to be Heather's one and only forever.

She had never felt that way about anyone before and she didn't want to feel it about anyone besides Heather. She hadn't thought she ever would and she didn't think she ever would again, and that is exactly what she'd set out to tell her best friend this morning.

Heather felt her blush deepen as Naya's eyes slowly scanned up her body before landing on her own. Naya's gaze was intense and unrelenting, but not harsh. She was focused, gauging, and determining but Heather didn't exactly know what or why. She decided to break the silence and possibly find out.

"Um hi," Heather said, surprised at her own nervousness. _"Get it together Morris,"_ she told herself.  
>Naya's eyes instantly softened and she was snapped out her Hemo trance when she heard the girl she had been staring at speak.<p>

"Um hi," Naya replied, feeling like she just got caught doing something she shouldn't have.

"Why do you look like you just got caught doing something you shouldn't have?" Heather asked teasingly.

It was Naya's turn to blush. "Um I, you, I was just," Naya tried to defend, reddening with each word.

"I don't know." She sighed, defeated. Heather laughed at her friend's uncharacteristic bashfulness.

"Relax Nay," she said, getting up and hugging her friend. Heather's arms just felt right around the smaller girl.

Any awkwardness or nervousness Naya had been feeling disappeared as soon as she felt her best friend's arms around her. This was Heather after all, and she began to laugh as well when she realized how stupid she was being.

"Gosh Heather, what do you do to me?" Naya asked as she broke the hug feigning faintness.

"I don't know. Why don't you tell me? I mean you did just spend almost two whole minutes checking me out," Heather responded playfully. "So," she continued sitting back on the couch and opening her arms to Naya, "Why don't you come over here and tell me what was running through that pretty little head of yours."

Naya instinctively moved to sit down on the couch with her best friend, settling back into the taller girls arms. She didn't even think about how their cuddling might make the conversation she was about to start more awkward.

When they had both gotten comfortable, Heather wrapped her arms closely and possessively around Naya. She rested her hands on the smaller girl's stomach and Naya placed her arms and hands atop Heather's.

They sat in silence, enjoying the ease of being together. The atmosphere was totally different than it had been earlier that morning when they were in a similar position.

Heather lightly poked Naya's stomach, urging her to begin.

"Soooooo what were you thinking about when you were so blatantly staring at all this hotness?" she asked with a smile and a tease in her voice.

"I was thinking," Naya started, smiling and elbowing Heather gently as she spoke, "about how," she paused, picking up Heather's hand in her own and tickling the blonde's palm with her fingertips (she knew this made the blonde giggle).

"…beautiful you are," Naya finished, lacing her fingers through her best friend's and bringing their clasped hands to her lips.

She pressed her lips to the girl's skin and let them linger there. She wanted to leave the imprint of her lips on Heather's hand just as she wanted to leave the imprint of her love on Heather's heart.

When she felt she'd significantly conveyed her message, Naya set their clasped hands back on her stomach and then waited. She wanted to gauge Heather's reaction before she continued into far more serious territory.

They sat in silence for what felt like forever. Naya was beginning to panic a little when Heather spoke in a half whisper.

"Wow," She breathed out. Naya let out a breath she didn't even know she was holding.

"Um Nay, could you get up?" Heather asked timidly.

_Great, now she doesn't want to touch me. Maybe I shouldn't have done that._Naya thought to herself.

"Uh, yeah," Naya replied, failing to hide the hurt in her voice. She stood and started busying herself organizing her make up in front of the mirror, desperately trying to ignore the blonde who was getting up slowly from the couch.

_"I'm such an idiot. She has a boyfriend. You need to know your place Rivera,"_ she scolded internally.

"Naya what are you doing?" Heather asked slightly amused and slightly agitated. _"One minute she's calling me beautiful and kissing my hand and the next she's ignoring me," _she sighed.

Heather walked to her best friend, grabbed her by the arm and turned her around, forcing the girl to look her in the eye.

As she looked down into brown eyes full of hurt and confusion her body filled with an overwhelming desire to do anything to make it all go away. At the same time her brain screamed out, _"What am I doing? What are _we_ doing?"_

"I—" Naya started to answer but before she could finish she felt herself being turned around. She looked up into Heather's eyes and for the first time she couldn't read them, or maybe she didn't want to. "I don't —"

Heather knew what Naya was going to say, answering even her unasked questions, and she couldn't bear to hear it. Doing the only thing she could think to do, the only thing she wanted to do, she crashed her lips down to Naya's.

Heather kissed Naya passionately wanting her, begging her, willing her, to feel everything she was feeling and hoping to erase all the thoughts and fears in her own head as well as any that may have been in the smaller girl's.

Again Naya found herself being cut off before she could finish her sentence, this time by Heather's mouth on her own. The words died on her lips and as she kissed Heather back eagerly, forgetting what it was she didn't know in the first place.

She knew without a doubt that this is where she wants to stay forever. This is where she belonged. Naya wrapped her arms around Heather's waist and pulled her closer deepening the kiss, praying it would never end. She nibbled on Heather's lip signaling that this was quickly headed into something more than just a kiss.

Heather moaned appreciatively and Naya smirked into the kiss. Even though she knew that she needed to talk to Heather, she didn't feel much like talking anymore. Just as she started kissing down Heather's jaw line, Heather's cell phone vibrated on the table startling the girls apart as if they'd just been walked in on.

Before Heather went to check her, now silent, phone she glanced quickly into Naya's eyes and saw that the other girl look as guilty as Heather felt.

That's when it all came back to Naya; the guilt, the love, the intense desire for something more, and the whole reason Naya had come to talk to Heather in the first place.

"It was just Ashley. She probably just wanted –" Heather started, but now it was Naya's turn to interrupt.

"Heather. What are we doing?"

"I – I don't know," Heather stammered, registering the magnitude of what had just occurred and for the first time acknowledging her feelings about the whole situation.

Heather was with Taylor but she wanted Naya. She wanted Naya, but couldn't have her even though she did have her. She had Naya as often as she wanted, probably forever, and Naya had her and Heather never wanted it to stop.

"I don't know either," Naya said telling the truth. She sat down on a chair at the table even though she wanted so badly to go sit next to her best friend. The girl looked like she was breaking, but she didn't trust herself not to latch her mouth onto the Heather's again and never let go, complicating the situation further.

"I don't want to stop," Heather said as if she'd just admitted to the worst crime in the world.

"I don't want to stop either." Naya replied quietly afraid that Heather might change her mind or worse, think she was a horrible person. The second fear was more connected to what Naya was about to say next. She hoped it wouldn't destroy this twisted relationship that had become of their friendship.

"But I don't know how much longer I can do this," Naya breathed out and Heather's head shot up. Her eyes were a cloudier gray than Naya had ever seen them. If her face was any indication of what was going inside of the blonde she was utterly destroyed.

"Why?" Heather asked, afraid of the answer but needing to know just the same.

Naya looked just as shocked as Heather had a moment prior. She hadn't expected her friend to ask her that. She knew the answer, she just didn't know if she could say it. They had said it to each other millions of times before but Naya knew that this time it would be different. It would be heavy. It would be real.  
>Naya took a deep breath, steeling herself for this confession. She wasn't sure how Heather would react, but she hoped with everything in her that she wouldn't lose her best friend.<p>

She could handle no sex. She could handle no hand holding and flirting, but she couldn't handle completely losing the girl that she'd come to depend on like she depended her heart to keep beating.  
>"Heather I think – I think I –"<p>

Suddenly the trailer was filled with sunlight as the door to the girls' trailer was flung open.

"HEATHER!"

"Mom? Mom what are you doing here?" Heather shrieked turning the question into more of an exclamation as she ran to hug her mother.

"I – we wanted to surprise you!" Heather's mom answered, her grin growing wider with her daughter in her arms, if that was even possible.

"We?" Heather and Naya both asked in very different tones.

"Yes, we," Heather's mom said letting go of Heather and stepping to the side to reveal Heather's boyfriend standing just left of the door, holding a multi-colored bouquet of two dozen roses.

"Tay! Oh my gosh! What are you doing here?" Heather yelled, the shock obvious in her voice.

"Yes Taylor, what _are_you doing here?" Naya said unenthusiastically, but quietly enough, that only Heather could hear her.

It was no secret that Naya didn't show a fondness to the boy that publically claimed Heather as his own. Perhaps that was because Naya knew, well felt, who Heather truly belonged to and with.

Heather shot Naya a quick glance with her eyes that shut Naya up. The eye contact lasted less than two seconds but that was enough for a conversation to pass between the two girls.

_"Behave. Please?"_Heather's eyes pleaded.

_"Why?"_Naya's hardened eyes challenged.

_"Please."_Heather's eyes begged, her mouth twitching slightly.

_"Fine. I'm over it."_Naya's eyes shot back. They turned from hard to cold and disconnected as Naya plastered a smile passable for genuine, to those who didn't truly know her.

"Hey mama!" Naya said, getting up and going to embrace her "second mother."

"Hey baby!" Heather's mom said back, wrapping Naya tightly in her arms. "It's good to see you."

"You too mama," Naya replied.

"Hello Taylor," Naya said, attempting to hide the distaste in her voice.

"Hey Naya," Taylor said back coolly. The boy always made a show of attempting to get along with her. She was Heather's best friend after all and he knew that if he didn't play nice with her, Heather wouldn't play naughty with him.

"Naya, I trust you've been taking good care of my girl," Heather's mom said moving away from Naya and into the trailer.

"Oh yeah," Naya said smirking at the memory of exactly how well she took care of Heather the night before, and the night before that, and two weeks ago after a night on the town.

"The best," Naya said, emphasizing the last word and staring Taylor directly in the eyes as she quoted what Heather screamed every time Naya "took care" of her.

"So, um, baby are you uh surprised?" Taylor fumbled out, obviously uncomfortable under Naya's death stare.

"Yes! I am so surprised! Thank you babe." Heather said walking over to her boyfriend and placing a quick peck on his lips.

"I haven't seen you in almost three months, I surprise you with roses and that's all I get?" Taylor said faking hurt. Heather kissed him again, this time longer and deeper.

"Mmmmm," Taylor moaned into the kiss. "That's more like it," He said pulling Heather into a hug and smiling smugly over her head at Naya.

Heather buried her head in Taylor's neck and took in the scent of him. It was clean and fresh, but Heather noted that she didn't enjoy it nearly as much as she did Naya's.

_"Naya smells sweet and spicy and like home,"_Heather thought to herself.

Naya cleared her throat behind them, not sure she could stand another moment of this oh so sweet reunion.

_"Heather couldn't even remember her own name last night, let alone his,"_Naya thought, trying to soothe the green monster raging in the back of her head and make herself feel better.

Instead, the green monster roared louder and her heart broke a bit more, longing to be the one holding onto the blonde. Naya wanted to be the one to surprise her and bring her roses and call her baby and kiss her deeply.

Naya wanted to be Heather's everything, her only thing.

Suddenly this all felt like too much to Naya. She couldn't be around Heather and Taylor right now. She couldn't play nice and pretend that she didn't want to rip the boys head off or yell at him about how Heather begged for her to spend the night almost every night for the three months since he'd last seen her.  
>Instead she settled for going to set to get prepared for that day's shooting even though she wouldn't be needed for at least another hour.<p>

"Um I'm going to give you all time to catch up," Naya said walking back inside to grab her phone before heading towards wardrobe.

"Oh Naya honey, you don't have to leave. We're just as much here to see you as we are to see Heather," Mama Morris said cheerily from the couch.

Naya stifled a bitter laugh. She knew that Taylor could care less if Naya was here. He'd probably prefer if Naya was gone actually.

"No, no it's okay. I don't want to intrude. I know Heather and Taylor don't want any distractions."

Naya caught Heather's eyes on the last word. In them she saw a flash of something she couldn't quite place. It looked like a mix between anger and hurt; exactly what Naya was feeling. "Besides I should get ready for shooting."

"Well at least join us for lunch later. This trip wouldn't be the same without you," Mama insisted and Naya knew better than to say no.

"Alright, that sounds great," Naya said, her enthusiasm falling short of where it should've been. She didn't bother to stick around to hear lunch details.

Taylor had pulled Heather onto his lap in the very same chair she had just been sitting and was tickling her and kissing her, making her laugh.

Naya felt the little green monster, which was now more like a giant green beast, flaring up again.  
>"I'll see you later Mama," she said not even bothering to hide the unhappiness in her voice as she turned and walked out of trailer. She felt tears stinging her eyes as soon as she heard the door close behind her and she did her damnedest to hold them in.<p>

With each step towards wardrobe and away from Heather, who was now in the arms of her boyfriend, Naya felt her heart break a little bit more, which she hadn't thought was possible.

It wasn't until her phone vibrated with a text message from Heather that her tears reached their spilling point.

"Nay, I'm so so so so sorry about being interrupted. What you were saying sounded important. I promise we'll find time to talk about it. I'm so glad you're coming to lunch with us. I haven't had lunch without you in, I don't know how long and I don't want that to change now. I'll tell you deets when I see you on set."

Naya's lips cracked into a broken watery smile. She laughed once, half- heartedly, hearing Heather's voice as she read the text. Her phone vibrated again as a second message from her friend appeared.

"You looked upset when you left. You okay?"

She wiped away a tear from her phone's screen and stared at the question Heather had just asked her. She read it over again and for some reason, didn't know how to answer truthfully.

"Yeah I'm fine Hemo. Just tired. I'm looking forward to lunch too. Your mom is always fun to hang out with. I'm getting make up done and you know how they hate it when we text, see you on set."

Her phone vibrated again an instant later.

"We're okay right? "

Naya felt her heart sink. Tears streamed down her face uncontrollably. She pushed the sleep button on the top of her phone, the black screen displaying the reflection of her wet face.

"I don't know," She answered out loud.


End file.
